More Adventurous

There might be a major change in my life but I don’t know it yet.

I’m not freaking out. I know, reasonably, there is not a chance. But it’s the fact that it might actually be true that calms me. Its when I’m most afraid of just the threat that makes me panic. I know that that doesn’t make much sense.

I am doing everything possible so my plan in life works out the way I want it to. You know, basically. Maybe somethings just happen because they are meant to.

I’m trying to be healthy. I’m trying to lose weight. I’m trying to move on with my life. I’m trying to live a clean, honest, purpose-driven life.

Yet I wonder why things are so complicated.

I feel strange. Physically and emotionally.

That moment when you finish a book, look around, and realize that everyone is just carrying on with their lives as though you didn’t just experience emotional trauma at the hands of a paperback.

I go through a serious emotional break up whenever I finish a book I’m serious.

Starting my recovery.

Doing homework sipping chamomile tea listening to Gotye’s Somebody That I Used to Know over and over.